absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
