ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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