I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
