I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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