sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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