My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
