i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
