Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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