Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
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