her vagine was all disorganized.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
