OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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