How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
