you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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