I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
