sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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