I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize