She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize
