D3 body, D1 cock
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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