The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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