yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
