Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
