Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
