4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
