do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
