I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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