all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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