just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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