Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
