No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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