Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize