Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
