I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
