I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
