We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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