We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize