Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
