They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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