i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize
