I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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