okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
