So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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