so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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