So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
