Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
