I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
