maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
