To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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