I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
