dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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