guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
